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Today was a day full of excitement and tears, surprises and disappointments. I think a whole lot of that has to do with unrealistic expectations I had going in, but I’ll tell you about that as we go.
4:00 was the start of our morning. I love being here in Thailand, but I am looking forward to more normal daytime hours when we get home. The morning felt a lot like Christmas with some nervous energy thrown in. Even up through Saturday night, I was feeling pretty fantastic, just getting ready for the moment that we would see him for the first time, but once Sunday morning hit, I was pretty nervous. I was meeting my son for the first time, after all. We went down to breakfast and ate just for the sake of eating. We were at least 2 hours from seeing our kids for the first time, but every time we saw a little Thai kid in the lobby, our stomachs would lurch into our throats and our hearts would skip a beat, wondering if it was them. We came back to the room and spent some time preparing for the huge day ahead; picking out the toys we would play with and setting up camera gear. We also spent some time praying together and got teary-eyed, thinking about what was just about to happen. Even with all of that done, we had about 30 minutes until our first meeting with the social worker and we were just feeling restless, so we went down to the lobby to hang out with the other family and wait… and wait… and wait… I feel like time stood still today. Finally, the appointed time came, and along with it, one of the workers from HSF. We introduced ourselves and made it back up to our room to go over some last minute details before the kids arrived. She handed us a Thai flag and a bunch of paperwork, but I honestly couldn’t tell you much more than that, because our minds were all elsewhere. During that time, her phone rang and we found out that the kiddies had arrived. She excused herself and we got ourselves in position, seated on the floor, for them to make their grand entrance.
You could hear footsteps and voices out in the hall and before we knew it, there were 3 social workers in the room, and two very nervous little kids. The other little girl was quick (really quick) to warm up to her family, but our son was much more reserved. You could tell that he was afraid and he looked like he had just been crying, with his bottom lip pouting a bit and his eyes looking like they were about to start flowing at any second. With encouragement from the social workers, he kept slowly taking steps towards us as I was beaming and Aaron sat next to me crying. The social workers pulled out a couple of toys for him to play with (not sure why since we had some sitting right next to us), and eventually, they found one to do the trick. It was a door pop-up game where you spin a dial or push a button and the door pops up and then you shut it. He started to really get excited about that one and would help us open and shut the doors and that is how we were able to touch for the first time. He also made TONS of eye contact as we were playing and we were really excited about that. You could so get lost in those almost black eyes… they are incredible! We saw little glimpses of smiles and eventually got around to setting our blocks that we brought to play with on the doors that were opening so they could fall off and he thought that was great fun. From there, we were able to build some towers and knock them over and that was great too.
We felt like we were really starting to make some progress, but the social workers wanted to keep things moving, so we made our way out on to the balcony and Aaron was able to pick him up for the first time and hold him. At that point, the tears couldn’t be held back any longer and the dam broke. You can tell that it is going to be a rough few weeks for him. Transitions are difficult for him and I so wish I could communicate better and let him know what is coming next, but we will get there. Since we were up, they decided we should go try some lunch and we made our way across the street to eat. He let Aaron hold him the whole time and sat on his lap for lunch. He had a little car with him and drove it all over the table as we waited for our meal. He wouldn’t let Aaron feed him initially, but he does a really good job of eating on his own. At one point, Aaron took a bean out of his meal and put it in Ty’s and with his tiny little fingers, he picked it up and put it right back on Aaron’s plate. 🙂 Good boy. He let me carry him back to the hotel and we spent quite a bit of time in the courtyard, checking out the fountain, fish, and pool. He already likes to imitate Aaron.
We were told that it would be good to spend some time in the room, so we brought him back up and everything was wonderful… for about 10 minutes. We were giggling (the most fantastic laugh ever, by the way) and playing, and then he turned around and saw a picture book from his foster home and all was lost. Immediate tears and crying for home. It’s so sad to see him that way and he just can’t be distracted by any toys once that starts. We tried balloons, blocks, and reading and he would just shut it down and keep saying that he wanted home and his mom. Can’t blame him. It is such a big leap, to meet two complete strangers in a day and spend so much time with them. He is pretty adament when he wants to go, grabbing his shoes to put them on and pointing to the door. In really good news, when that happens, he comes to both Aaron and I and lets us pick him up and hold him which is pretty great. We had a trail of big tears on our wood floors and did our best to comfort him through it.
At 1:30, it was time to head to the foster family’s home, so we packed up and went down to the lobby. On the car ride there, Ty loved watching all of the traffic and was eventually able to fall asleep in Aaron’s lap on the hour ride to the home.
In the not so good news department, one of our memory cards from the first meeting is corrupted. Hoping that we can use some recovery software when we get home to get that footage. It was one of three cameras though, so we still have two other angles of the moments. 🙂 A good reason to always have a backup.
We love him so much already! The morning was really wonderful and was much less pressure than I had put on myself. It was just so good to finally see him for the first time, hear him giggle, see him smile, and be able to comfort him through his tears. I have a feeling that that is the name of the game for the next few days. He is soooo handsome and you could just stare into his eyes forever… fortunately for us, we get to do that now because we are no longer waiting!
Stay tuned for parts 2 & 3 (it was a really big day).
